Our Heart

I found it, the other day. I mean I wasn't really looking, I know I put it away for one reason or another. But after taking it back out and holding it back up I realized, it is so strong and durable. It has been through a lot over these years. Kicked around, throw at the wall, left in dark rooms all by itself while the owner ran around being young and stupid. So many good times and bad times, times when I thought it would just swell and break all on its own. Although it has been scuffed and tattered it still remains as it was when I put it away. Upon holding it up to the light I can see the tiniest shimmer of gold, maybe a few more years and it will be all cleaned up and ready to shine again. Who knows, there are always going to be dark roads and careless strangers. Somewhere out there there is a person who will appreciate it and take it in, set it up high and never leave it in dark rooms. Maybe rest it by the fireplace and keep it warm, always near the conversation in the room. That is the goal I guess, what we all search for when we give away our hearts.

Like A Child

Sometimes I feel as if I have the heart of a child. So honest and pure, hopeful and easily loving of others. Sometimes I feel that is a huge downfall, who wants to be this old and still get there heart smashed to pieces because you are just to innocent with love. By far am I saying I am the best person in the world, I do have many flaws and have made many mistakes, maybe I deserve the pain that has been given to me. All I am truly saying is I love too easily and too often, I love in the wrong direction, I love strangers who have only but showed me a small portion of their time. I can fall in love with the idea of a person before ever meeting them. Why is this, is this something wrong, is this is a misfire of something in my brain. Can this actually be considered a flaw, maybe, I mean no one wants a fool. Sometimes I want to retract from the world and just be alone, I am far too scared of getting my heart hurt again, like a child I must protect it from the people wanting to do it harm. Sometimes, most of the time, I never want to feel that way again, I never want to try, to put myself out there. But then I think, maybe this time will be different, maybe I will be loved back as innocently and as strongly as I love them. Someday I hope this to be true, as for now I wait silently in a world of strangers, too hurt to really open up to friends who aren't really there anyways.

Lady In Black

Oh, why? Why do you come into my place of work? Almost every night I see you, but you never see me. You come in many shapes and shades but always donning the same casual layers of black. Black shirt sweetly tucked into the form fitting black slacks, black belt ever so seductively wrapped around the waist. You intrigue me the way you seem to effortlessly float around the place, the building conforms to your every movement, like the ocean reaching out only to caress the shore as often and shyly as possible. The one enigmatic thing I would love to ask you, or maybe ask the universe, is why I never see you leave. You come in like a crook only to escape unseen, nothing out of its place, only specific items that were there just for you to take. Items I had no clue were even there, so their disappearance has no effect on me. I only catch a glimpse of you as you enter through the corner of my eye, like a mystic, an enigmatic creature spoken of throughout time but never proven to exist. Why? Why do you come into my place of work?

From the childhood, reawaken the mysteries....

This painting was inspired by all the glory and joy of being a kid and finding the mystery in everything. Whether it be happy, fun or scary, we used our imagination and we saw things that we never thought we could. Things that never and will never truly exist, but we believed hard enough to make them real. So I said "why can we not have that as an adult", I don't see why not, and we very well should. This is an offering to all the minds that got lost along the way, through hard days in high school to a rough day at a job you hate, daydream and set your mind free, don't be afraid to make believe. 

I had the best time painting this, it was all very random. I just sat down, flipped on my video camera and just started, little to no sketching involved, just let the idea create itself as I was painting. There is also a video to this on youtube, I tried to post it on here, will try again. I am hoping if I can post here, and have videos on youtube I can spread my art around more and hopefully break into this art world full force.